Witchcraft and Politics: A Socratic Comedy

In the Chamber of

By Plutonix

In the bustling agora of Athens, amidst the aroma of roasted figs and lively debate, Socrates and Cephalus find themselves entangled in a discussion that veers unexpectedly into the realm of mysticism and magic. Recent events in the Maldives, where allegations of black magic have surfaced among political elites, serve as the catalyst for their musings.

Setting: A quaint Athenian café, bustling with patrons enjoying their midday meals. Socrates, the wise and probing philosopher, and Cephalus, an elderly businessman whose passion lies in politics, with a knack for colourful stories sit at a corner table, amidst the hum of conversation and the clinking of plates.

Socrates: Ah, Cephalus, my esteemed friend and man of the political arena! I hear the winds of intrigue and mystique blow strong in your world these days.

Cephalus: Indeed, Socrates! Politics these days is not just about speeches and policies; it’s about who can summon the best astrologer or brew the most potent potion.

Socrates: Potions, you say? Have we delved into the realm of witchcraft and wizardry now? I thought our statesmen dealt in laws and treaties, not spells and enchantments.

Cephalus: (chuckles) You’d be surprised, Socrates. Behind closed doors, many a politician consults with seers and soothsayers to divine the future. Some even have personal gurus who prescribe rituals to sway the electorate or align the stars in their favour.

Socrates: Intriguing! Tell me, Cephalus, do these mystical consultations yield tangible results? Can a well-timed ritual swing an election as deftly as a persuasive debate?

Cephalus: (smirks) Ah, Socrates, you jest, but there are tales aplenty of politicians attributing their victories to such occult practices. Why, I once knew a fellow who swore by a crystal ball gifted to him by a famous psychic! Said it foretold every legislative victory he’d achieve.

Socrates: A crystal ball, you say. And here I thought the oracles of Delphi were the pinnacle of prophetic prowess. Do these modern fortune-tellers claim they have the same divine knowledge?

Cephalus: (leaning in conspiratorially) They do indeed! Though their predictions often seem as vague as a riddle from the Sphinx, politicians eagerly embrace it like it’s the elixir of life. Why, I’ve seen hardened veterans of the Senate turn to jelly at the mention of an auspicious alignment of stars.

Socrates: Fascinating. It seems our leaders are not immune to the allure of the unknown. But tell me, Cephalus, is there merit in such practices beyond mere superstition? Could there be a deeper psychology at play?

Cephalus: (stroking his chin) Ah, you delve into the heart of the matter, Socrates! I’ve pondered this myself. Perhaps these rituals provide a psychological edge — a placebo effect, if you will. Belief can be a powerful force, especially in the cutthroat world of politics.

Socrates: So, it’s not just about waving wands and muttering incantations. It’s about the confidence these rituals instil in the practitioner and their followers.

Cephalus: Precisely! Imagine standing before a crowd, knowing the stars have aligned in your favour or that a mystical blessing ensures your success. It’s like having an invisible shield against doubt and criticism.

Socrates: Yet, Cephalus, one wonders: does this reliance on mystical aids not undermine the meritocracy of governance? Should our leaders not be judged by their deeds and decisions, rather than the whims of fortune tellers?

Cephalus: (laughs) Ah, my dear Socrates, you speak truth. But in the arena of politics, perception often trumps reality. If a leader appears blessed by fate, their followers will overlook many a flaw. After all, charisma and charm have always been potent spells in their own right.

Socrates: And what of the dark arts, Cephalus? Are there whispers of politicians dabbling in darker forms of magic to secure their ambitions?

Cephalus: (eyes twinkling) Oh, indeed! Rumours abound of clandestine groups of witches who come together for performing secret rituals performed under the full moon. Though I suspect most of these tales are spun by rival factions seeking to tarnish their opponents’ reputations.

Socrates: A political witch hunt, you might say!

Cephalus: (laughs heartily) Quite so, Socrates! Though I must admit, there’s a certain irony in politicians decrying witchcraft while seeking guidance from astrologers and gurus.

Socrates: It seems the lines between superstition and strategy blur ever more in our modern age. Perhaps we should heed the wisdom of our forebears: “Know thyself” before consulting the stars.

Cephalus: Wise words indeed, my friend. But tell me, Socrates, do you think these practices will endure, or will reason eventually dispel the shadows of superstition?

Socrates: Ah, Cephalus, history teaches us that as long as ambition burns brightly in the hearts of men — and let’s not forget, in the hearts of women as well — people will always strive to gain any advantage the cosmos can provide. Like what’s recently happened in the Maldives. We hear of black magic performed in the higher echelons of power!

Cephalus: (nodding gravely) Indeed, Socrates. It appears Fathima Shamnaz Ali Saleem and Adam Rameez have allegedly turned to the ancient arts in pursuit of power. Who knew sorcery would become the latest tool in the politician’s arsenal?

Socrates: (stroking his beard) Tell me, Cephalus, what manner of black magic do you suppose they were brewing? A potion to summon votes, perhaps? Or a curse to thwart their rivals?

Cephalus: (leaning in, conspiratorially) Rumour has it that Fathima Shamnaz Ali Saleem, the state minister for the Environment Ministry, and her ex-husband, Adam Rameez, a minister at the President’s Office, along with two other individuals, have been arrested on charges of using witchcraft, reportedly to get closer to President Mohamed Muizzu! Though, judging by the outcome, they may have missed their mark.

Socrates: Ah, the perils of dabbling in the arcane arts without a proper understanding of causality. One wrong ingredient, and instead of acclaim, you find yourself in a cell!

Cephalus: (chuckles) It seems even in the Maldives, where the ocean’s serenity lulls you into a sense of calm, politics can be a tempestuous affair. Imagine the headlines: “Ministers Arrested for Enchanting Presidential Favour!”

Socrates: (nodding sagely) Truly, Cephalus, it underscores the timeless truth: power corrupts, but magic misused can lead to even greater calamities.

Cephalus: (sighs dramatically) One wonders if they consulted the spirits of their ancestors or simply binge-watched too many episodes of “Game of Thrones.”

Socrates: (laughs) Ah, the modern politician: part statesman, part sorcerer. Who knew governance could be such a bewitching endeavour?

Cephalus: (winking) Indeed, Socrates. Perhaps our leaders should stick to crafting policies rather than incantations. Though I must admit, the thought of parliamentary debates fuelled by magic spells does have a certain appeal.

Socrates: (musing) Imagine, Cephalus, a legislative session where the opposition’s arguments are met not with rebuttals but with curses and charms! Democracy would take on a whole new meaning.

Cephalus: (laughing heartily) Aye, and instead of resignations, we’d have exorcisms! “I hereby banish thee, corrupt official, to the nether realms of political oblivion!”

Socrates: (raising his cup) To Fathima, Adam, and their accomplices in the Maldives, who dared to blend politics with the supernatural! May their tale be a cautionary charm for future generations.

Cephalus: (clinking his cup with Socrates’) To politics: where every vote counts, and every spell must be cast wisely!

As Socrates and Cephalus toast to the absurdities of political life, the café echoes with their laughter. In the realm of philosophy and wit, they find solace amidst the tumultuous currents of worldly affairs. Meanwhile, in the Maldives and beyond, the saga of ministerial magic unfolds, a reminder that even in the modern age, the allure of ancient mysteries can ensnare the most unsuspecting of souls. And as the sun sets over the Aegean Sea, casting its golden light upon Athens, Socrates and Cephalus continue their dialogue, unperturbed by the arcane whirlwinds that sweep across distant shores.

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Mauritius Times ePaper Friday 5 July 2024